It’s Darkest Before the Dawn.

Hello brave friend! I’m having that push me pull me feeling again. It’s the feeling of holding two contrasting feelings or thoughts at once and it happens to me a lot. I don’t know if you can relate at this moment, but I think in general it is a very common human experience. Right now, this is coming in the form of a deep desire to be done with the old and a profound excitement for the arrival of the new. For me, this looks like wanting the school year to be over already and the bubbling excitement and curiosity of what summer holds. It’s like I’m watching a clock with a painfully slow second hand moving at half time… tick, tick, tick and simultaneously waiting to collapse in exhaustion and explode in delight all at the same time that the tiny hand finally reaches the top. Looking for inspiration this week, I was reading a Mindful Mini from over a year ago about the darkness that lays heaviest just before dawn. It is in this darkness that birds begin to sing a song of hope and encouragement. I love what I said about enduring the final steps of a difficult journey when we are most exhausted. “I wrote, THE darkest part of the night is just before the sun begins its ascension. You’ve likely heard birds start singing early in the morning even before the sun begins to rise. We’re told it’s a song of encouragement, a song of hope, a song that is saying… “Hold tight dear one, the light is coming. You can do it. We’re almost there.” Even without the proof of light on the horizon, the birds instinctively know that it’s coming and they share their song to remind us all to hold on.” Even without the proof of light, we can know instinctively that it’s coming. I think that this might be why I start to feel the tug of wonder and excitement as we approach summer. My body and mind feel the heavy weight of the final steps in front of me and I just want it to be over. And yet, my heart feels the joyful pull of all that summer has waiting and I cannot ignore the excitement that’s growing. I know my daughters feel this too as our dinner conversation tonight shifted from talk of final exams to the ‘summer bucket list’. My youngest absolutely lit up as she talked about the adventures she was planning in her mind. As she wove a story of outdoor concerts in the park, swimming under waterfalls and watching the stars from a field in the middle of nowhere… I could hear her song of hope take shape. She is the bird singing her own song of inspiration… she is reminding us all that the light is coming. And so, I offer this Mindful Mini invitation, lean into the darkness that you feel in this final stretch before the light and listen for your song of hope and inspiration. Resist the temptation to sink into the darkness in despair and bitterly trudge forward so you can just get it over with. Know, just KNOW that the light is coming and that the last brave steps of this part of the journey have purpose. Lean into the hope and inspiration of your own beautiful song. Sing that song of anticipation and joy… allow it to build and spark excitement.  Embrace what restoration, nourishment and giddiness will look like. Wrap up in a melody of the crashing ocean waves, bubbling mountainside streams, and the ohhhhh-ing sound we can’t help but make when we see fireworks, shooting stars and lightning bugs. Let that song sing you through until the light arrives. It’s coming, my loves. It’s ok to feel both the weight of the darkness, and the filling of your heart with song! Make way for the light, you are sooo worth it! Yours in heart, Kelly Driscoll