We need to talk…

Ok, so this mini topic isn’t new… in fact I have come back to it many times over the past two years when it feels like the thing that’s getting in our way. I find that we are, yet again, in need of this conversation. It’s one of those, “We need to talk” kind of conversations. You know, when things need to be said and even though you have a little pang in your chest, you bravely step up and get real about being real? Yeah, that’s how I feel. We need to talk.

I have long used the phrase… “When you’re ready” for myself and with others, as a way to acknowledge that we move forward when we are ready. It’s not necessarily meant to offer comfort, although when we’re feeling stuck it certainly can. It’s also not meant to enable, although, when we are reluctant to take ownership for our progress and choose the safety of staying where we are, it sometimes does. And, it definitely is not meant to suggest that being “ready” means we are prepared for what’s ahead.

It’s meant to acknowledge the hard truth that when we are ready for something different, we will choose differently. 

GAH! If only it were that simple, right?

The thing is, we tend to get tripped up the most when we don’t have the combination of being ready, AND having all the things, necessary skills, resources and emotional tools at our fingertips to ensure that our steps forward will be successful and without challenge. This part is impossible and that stings. The hard truth is “forward” is without guarantee and progress is never devoid of challenge. Being ready does NOT mean being prepared!! We cling to the idea that we need to be prepared for the next steps when ready is the real sweet spot!

This has been coming up a lot recently. I have listened to countless people talk about feeling a deep longing for something ‘more’ or perhaps just ‘different’, and yet, there is a reluctance to take brave leaps before having the parachute fully packed so to speak. I hear it all, “when the kids are a bit older”, “When I am no longer caring for my parents”, “When I have more money”, “When I get the new job”, “When I lose the weight”, “When I pay off the debt”…. And the one that takes the proverbial cake… “When I have more time”. It’s an endless cycle of preparation that is never fully complete and just serves to keep us completely stuck.

THIS is what we need to talk about. If you are stuck, if you need something you are not getting or if you set aside what you long for because you have determined it can’t happen now… YOU ARE READY! You’re probably  not prepared, but just feeling that desire is all you need to know. You are ready! When you dismiss those feelings because all the boxes haven’t been checked, You are robbing yourself of all the goodness that comes from bravely moving forward.

So, your Mindful Mini invitation this week is to let go of preparations and just do it! You won’t ever have more time, so choose to use time differently… you are ready! Money ebbs and flows, so shift your priorities and invest in YOU…you are ready! Getting through is no way to live, quit waiting for things to be better…you are ready! Let go of people pleasing, doing it right and perfectionism… and replace them with embracing what brings you solace, comfort, joy and meets your needs…you are ready! You are definitely not prepared, but you’re sooo ready. 

I’m glad we had this talk. It’s time and you are so worth it!

Yours in heart,

Kelly Driscoll